You don’t just want to be busy

This past week or so has been crazy busy, which I love. When you’re two days into the workweek and have already clocked over 27 hours, you feel pretty accomplished. Until you realize that you’re behind on everything, and then you feel guilty. You see, I’ve been working pretty consistently in 2019, but the self tapes with Ayisha were pretty much the extent of my acting this year. I realized that in my fervour to make the money that would allow me to keep pursuing my dream past some arbitrary deadline, I was forgetting to actually pursue my dream. I know supporting myself and not being homeless is a huge priority, but if I’m wasting time rather than working on my acting every day, I might as well get a 9 to 5 and be a lot less stressed all the time.
Luckily, some of my side hustles do let me practice my acting. Last week I got to be a part of a heartbreaking scenario with so much depth that simply scratching the surface of it made me break down.
After sitting with her for a couple of hours, I was more than ready to get to my training for the auto show. That being said, I may have nearly teared up during that one as well. What can I say? commercials get to me and we should all #livebytheleaf.

I tried to get in as much jiu-jitsu that week, because I knew the auto show hours wouldn’t allow me much training time. One day we had over 20 students in each class, and another had 2 girls I know from stunt training come try it out. My size and strength mean that I rarely submit my opponent, unless they are children or it is their first day, in which case I usually try to help them learn stuff instead. So basically I almost never get submissions unless someone lets me. The night with those girls was different because although they were pretty new, they were also roughly my size, and absolute badasses. So I didn’t feel the need to be overly gentle on them. I’m very aware that they will dominate me as soon as they have the tiniest bit more experience, but it was really fun to go at it and not feel that every move I achieved was given to me.
Another of my side hustles was working for elections in Oshawa, which gave me time to read and work on editing my own book.
Valentine’s Day was pretty cool because it was my first time actually having a valentine. We cooked, we ate relatively healthy, he got me cupcakes (and roses) to balance it out…I am one lucky gal.
I also happen to be working at the auto show in Toronto, minus the two days I had the immense pleasure of being on set. The hours are long but the people are cool, so stop by and say hi if you’re in town!
“It’s not enough to be busy, so are the ants. The question is, what are we busy about?”
-Henry David Thoreau

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