Patience and Patients

Things have been going pretty good for me lately 🙂 I am not overly busy, but I pretty consistently have something to do, which is nice. Don’t get me wrong, I love staying at home in my pj’s, watching tv and writing all day, but I can’t help but feel guilty for all the things I’m not doing, and it won’t make my dreams come true if that’s what I am doing every day.

Last Saturday, I woke up 4 hours before my call time so I could drive the 2 and a half hours to Ottawa without having to worry about being late. It was a long drive by myself, early in the morning, followed by a lot of sitting around once I got on set. Luckily, I was smart and brought some books, which I proceeded to finish before actually being in any scenes. I was playing a student, so I had thought to use them as props, but instead I got to read 2 plays and get some questions answered about Casting Directors 🙂

Once I finally made it to set, I mostly just walked inside at a specific moment, but between takes, I got to wait outside with two of the actors from the scene, who were super nice. They introduced themselves to me, and pretty much joked and told stories the whole time, which really makes me want to just hang out on set for the rest of my life. In the next scene we were in, I got to hang out with the other extras, since you can’t quite see me from all the different angles they were getting the shot from. I always find it interesting to learn that some people come and spend their days being an extra just for fun, without any urge to become an actor, just as something to do between workweeks at their real jobs. It is also with other actors that I feel the most ridiculous saying that I am an actress when they ask what I do. It isn’t exactly because I am acting so much, but because I don’t have another job. I am giving myself to the acting world, so though I may not be in any unions or get paid or anything yet, I am still an actress because it is what I am working towards and “I’m training to become an actor” doesn’t explain my situation as well as someone wanting to be a doctor who says “I’m in med school”. But anyhow, I had a great time, and don’t even resent the nearly 6 hours I spent driving there and back 🙂

Over the weekend, I also had to change a few classes around, because Suzanna texted to ask me to be in her Tuesday class. I know that her Tuesday class is now listed as mixed level, and it was to fill a spot that was left vacant, but I still like to think that she saw such an improvement in me that she felt I deserved to be in the Tuesday class 😉 I don’t think I made the best first impression, as I kind of fumbled over my words and didn’t show enough passion, but that is why you go to class, so you can constantly improve and work harder and get better without it costing you a job. And even with the line flubbing, I had such a fun time up there, and with everyone in the class, who was so nice and were joking around and making each other laugh between takes. I am definitely looking forward to next Tuesday, when I get to do another scene from Erin Brokovitch 🙂

Having Suzanna’s class on Tuesday meant that I had to switch into the Friday stunt stage class. I kind of feel like I keep putting it off because I am afraid of breaking something or not being able to keep up (2 very realistic fears), but I actually had a legitimate reason and will be there with full force tomorrow, after spending the day playing a patient.

I got to act as a fake patient for the first time before class on Tuesday. When I got the ultrasounds, I was there as me, helping them practice, but the other day I was there with an alias, with a fake history and symptoms and…it was really cool. It’s not exactly like movie acting, because you only have your character and the story, you don’t have lines, but it is amazing practice. It is like Drinking Buddies or This is 40, the movies where you had a character and you know where the story is going, but the lines aren’t set in stone, you improvise and make it your own, changing it with the director’s input or what the other actors give you. I had the same information each time, but different people came in and asked me different questions in different ways, or found different things interesting. It was a whole lot of fun, and I am looking forward to my even more elaborate background story on Friday.

As far as my list for September is concerned, I only have 2 more plays to go, which I have been saving for my two upcoming days on set as an extra, I have written a couple more pages in the book, and plan on doing a lot of the others things this afternoon. As for the audition, I haven’t had one yet, but I have a self-tape request, and am waiting upon a reply with my audition time for another project. I often get this fear like I am missing out on all these amazing shows or movies that are being filmed now, but we couldn’t have predicted them 10 years ago, just like I have no idea what incredible projects await me in my future. You just have to work hard and concentrate on giving your all to what you are working on right now, and the rest should fall into place 🙂

“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.”

-Bill Cosby